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What if it's too late?

It won't be—it's never too late! Maybe you have a son or daughter in their late teens and you haven't talked to them about these things. Don't worry.  Make a point to start the conversation today.

It might be more difficult without a proven track record of trust and communication and it may get worse before it gets better. Although an environment of boundaries gives a teen a sense of security eventually, it will feel oppressive at first if they're not used to it.

Make sure you own your mistakes and face your fears and concerns.

Go back to basics—go back to "self-directed child" concepts

But (I think) they've already had sex!

  • LOVE THEM! – This isn't the end of the world!!
    This is what good parenting is all about.
  • A second chance – help them understand that abstinence is a choice that they can return to at any time, even after they've had sex.
  • Help them with setting firm limits for themselves.  Discuss with them practical ways that they can stick with the limits they've set.